Facts about me:
🙋🏻‍♀️I am scared shitless to homeschool.
😖I worry I made the wrong call.
🙍🏻‍♀️I feel guilt pulling them from their school.
😢I cry at the thought of leaving our special ed providers.
😭I also cry at the thought of losing my few hours of alone time.
🤦🏻‍♀️And then I feel guilty again for grieving the loss of time away from them.
😨I get anxious thinking about how to manage everyone’s tempers and feelings being together all the time. (Thanks for the preview, Covid.)
😣I fear I will ruin their love of learning and straight up fail at teaching them math. (Thank God for actuary husbands.)
😡I’m angry that we basically got forced into this decision with no alternative that would serve our family better.
🤬I’m furious at the lack of accommodations being made for special needs students who are hurting.
🙏🏻I pray for change.
🦸🏻‍♀️I pray for courage and patience.
🙌🏼I am grateful we have the ability to try this new way of schooling.
🤩I am excited over the freedom it allows.
🥳I am freaking ecstatic over having control of our schedule again.
🥰I am happy I will get more than just their exhausted hours during the week.
🤓I can’t wait to dive in and see how each of my children flourish.
😍I truly feel in my heart this is the best decision for our family.

That last fact? Mommas, that’s the only one that matters in your schooling decisions this year. 👊🏼 You don’t have to explain or defend any of the others to anyone. 🙅🏻‍♀️ But you do get to feel them. We can be more than one thing. We can have more than one emotion, even opposing ones. We can excitedly lay out the curriculum and also be completely overwhelmed by it and second guess ourselves. We can charge full steam ahead into this new adventure and still wish things would just go back. 🙏🏽

For me when the fears and doubts and anxieties and misgivings overload me, I lay them at the feet of the Lord. I ask to be released from them. I ask for strength and continue on taking the next step in the path He has laid on my heart. ❤️

Have courage, mommas. I sure wish the precedented times would come back but these ain’t them. 😂 These are mad times we live in. MAD! (Anybody?⚡️) And we are all just doing the best we can!

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